Have Weddings Undergone A Cultural Shift?

How Couples Celebrate Their Union – Then and Now

While weddings are one of the most significant rituals in human society, like all traditions, they evolve over time. Today’s weddings often look very different from those celebrated by our grandparents or great-grandparents. While 50 or 60 years ago, marriage was largely about formalizing a union with legal and societal approval, modern weddings are increasingly about personal expression. As a full-service event agency specializing in wedding planning, we’ve seen firsthand how this shift in focus reflects broader changes in society and how couples approach marriage and life itself.

Marriage Generations Ago – A Social Contract

In the mid-20th century, weddings were often seen as the beginning of a societal contract, not just between two people but between two families. For many couples of that time, marriage meant stability, security, and approval in the eyes of their community. With that, the ceremony was a rite of passage, ensuring sustained legal and social protection. The wedding day itself was often a formal, somewhat standardized event, focusing on religious customs and traditional vows, with less emphasis on the couple’s unique personalities or preferences. Let’s take a look at some of the reasons, why.

Anthropologically speaking, marriage has long been associated with family alliances, economic stability, and inheritance, rooted in legal and religious frameworks. In Marriage, A History Stephanie Coontz explains how the primary function of marriage was to formalize relationships in a way that benefitted the larger social group. In most societies, there was significant pressure to marry. This was especially true for women, for whom marriage was often the only socially acceptable path to financial security and societal respect.

Thus, the wedding ceremonies of the 20th century reflected the cultural expectation of that time: the celebration was important, but it wasn’t the focus. Simple church weddings, followed by receptions with close family and friends were the norm. The legal and religious aspects of the union took precedence, symbolizing societal approval.

The Shift – Personalization Over Formalization

Fast forward to today, and the landscape of weddings has dramatically shifted. The focus is no longer purely on the legal act of getting married or fulfilling a societal expectation. Instead, modern couples approach their weddings as a platform for self-expression! Now the emphasis is on creating a memorable experience that speaks to – and shows off – their individuality, reflecting their unique personalities, tastes, and stories, rather than conforming to a traditional mold.

This change in the personal sphere ties in with broader cultural shifts that have taken place over time. In many Western countries, marriage no longer carries the same legal and social weight it once did. Couples now often live together before marriage, with cohabitation seen as a socially acceptable norm. Many no longer feel the need to marry for financial stability or societal approval, as women have become more financially independent, and society has become more accepting of various types of relationships. A Pew Research study found that fewer people view marriage as essential for a successful life, than before, with a greater emphasis on individual happiness and personal fulfillment.

From an anthropological perspective, this shift represents a move from formal wedding rituals to a celebration of personal choice and love. From marriage as an institution and a public contract with social control and economic alliance to what is now a personal and emotional commitment, celebrated in creative and individual ways.

The Modern Wedding – A Celebration of Identity

For many couples today, their wedding is about telling their story. Elaborate themes, personalized vows, and unique rites that reflect shared experiences, values, and personalities turn modern celebrations into highly curated experiences. The focus is on the event itself—its design, aesthetics, and the overall guest experience, not just on saying “I do”.

Couples now often hire professionals to create these highly individualized curated wedding experiences. Planners, designers, and stylists look after every aspect of the celebration, to turn it into a reflection of the couple’s love story. Whether it’s a bohemian outdoor wedding in the Austrian Alps or an ultra-modern city celebration, every element is chosen to reflect the couple’s identity. Some even forgo traditional elements like the white dress or formal vows in favour of more personal and symbolic touches, such as themed attire, choreographed dances, or meaningful locations.

Interestingly, the increasing role of social media has also played a part in this shift. With platforms like Instagram and Pinterest, couples are exposed to a vast array of wedding styles and ideas, encouraging them to think beyond traditional norms. Weddings are now seen as “shareable” moments, with couples eager to create visually stunning events that can be captured and shared with a wider audience.

Weddings as Status Symbols

Not only since the arrival of Social Media have weddings become a way for couples to display their social standing and tastes. Historically, large and lavish weddings were used to show a family’s wealth, and reserved for the upper classes. Today, middle and upper-middle-class couples invest significant amounts of time and money into making their wedding day stand out. According to The Knot’s 2022 Real Weddings Study, the average cost of a wedding is € 28.000,– with a growing number of couples opting for luxurious venues, high-end catering, and bespoke designs.

This isn’t purely about showing off—it’s also about creating a meaningful experience that feels true to who they are. For many couples, their wedding day is one of the few times they can gather all their loved ones in one place, making it an occasion worthy of celebration in their own unique style.

What Has Changed?

Two aspects that have evolved significantly are the scale and the logistics of weddings. Where intimate church or community hall weddings were once the norm, couples today are choosing a variety of venues that can cater to everything from small, intimate affairs to large, extravagant celebrations. Professionals, such as full-service event planners, help create a seamless experience, no matter the size or complexity of the event.

Additionally, catering has become more specialized. While buffets or simple sit-down meals were once standard, today’s couples are embracing everything from gourmet food trucks to multi-course fine dining experiences, often tying the food choices or personal preferences into their theme.

What Has Stayed the Same?

While the cultural motivations behind weddings have evolved, some elements remain steadfast. Weddings continue to be a deeply emotional occasion, a public declaration of commitment, and a moment of transition into a new chapter of life. The celebration of love, community, and shared values is as central to weddings today as it was decades ago. However, modern couples are doing this in ways that feel authentic to them, and don’t merely conform to external expectations.

A Reflection of Modern Values

As weddings have evolved over generations, they have become less about fulfilling society’s expectations and more about reflecting the unique love stories of each couple. Weddings today are personal, creative, and a true celebration of individuality. This shift not only mirrors changing social values but also speaks to the growing importance of experiences and self-expression in modern life.

At Wolkenkuckuck Events, we understand the significance of making your wedding a unique reflection of your love story. Whether you’re looking for an intimate, minimalist gathering or a grand, statement-making event, we’re here to bring your vision to life, creating a day that you and your guests will remember forever.